Ghastly's Ghastly Comic

The plot is about two tentacle monsters (they may be aliens, but their origins are not specified), Glemph and Nort, who hang around in a Canadian bar, "The Spanked Monkey", and who meet several people who have trouble fitting into normal society because of their deviant behaviour or sexual preferences.

The main characters are:

Glemph: the blue tentacle monster. He has high moral standards and is easily offended by sex and brutality.

Nort: the green big-eyebrowed tentacle monster. More perverted than Glemph, he is often sex-starved and likes to have fun, despite criticism from his friend (brother?) Glemph.

Kiki: a beautiful and gentle dark-haired woman (who may be Japanese or not). Her sexual fantasy is tentacle rape. She has particularly a liking for Glemph, who rejects her advances.

Chibi Sue: a very small blonde girl in a Japanese sailor outfit. She is actually a 36-year old woman stuck in a chibi's body, complete with mitten-like hands. She has trouble finding acceptable sexual partners, as looking like a very young child, she only attracts creepy pedophiles. Though appearing innocent, she can sometimes have a downright evil mind.

Fnanp: a teenage boy who is extremely fond of Dungeons & Dragons and other RPGs. Always dressed as a wizard and wearing big glasses, he has tried to invoke "for real" Great Cthulhu, only to discover the Great Old One is really still a harmless baby. Worse, he's been stuck with the job of babysitting Lil' Cuthy.

Hammer: the bartender and owner of the bar "The Spanked Monkey". He is a large and hefty man, tough on the outside, but with a soft and creamy center. His bar policy is being tolerant towards all customers (except Bunny Boy towards whom he has a personal dislike). His past is shrouded in mystery, ranging from cowboy to homicide detective, and for some reason always seems to involve a young man named Clem who is continually masturbating.

Freddy: a redhead transexual otaku. He is always cheerful, constantly speaking in a babble of random quasi-Japanese. Dressed as a Japanese schoolgirl, Freddy is also obsessed with sex (particularly sodomy) and takes any opportunity to play around with his penis, which makes him genki. Though crazy, Freddy is very tender and friendly with people, often to their dismay.

Smokey: a "father-knows-best" middle-aged man who perpetually smokes a pipe. He acts like a normal family man and seems very respectable, although his fatherly advice is often mixed with sexual innendo. He often looks after Peep, Glemph's nephew and sometimes gets laid by unusual women like Freddy and Zsa Zsa.

Peep: Glemph's nephew. He is a short and innocent little tentacle monster child. He knew nothing about tentacle rape when propositioned by Chibi Sue (who thought he was a "mature" chibi too). Peep sometimes stays at Smokey's house, where he likes to pretend he's an imaginary crime-fighting ninja called "Zipper Ninja" (due to the fact that he wears a Gimp mask) with a kunoichi girl, "Muchi-san", using a box of sex toys as crime-fighting props.

Brewster "Da Funk" Bombe: an African American Blacksploitation film star from the 1970s. He is a party-goer and enjoys picking up girls. Alas for him, the only girl he managed to "get down" with so far has been Freddy.

Hentai Guy: a young Japanese man, he is a spoof of the protagonists of hentai games, who very often have black hair obscuring their faces and invisible penises. Hentai Guy is noticeable for having an invisible penis, which allows him to harass women secretly...

Zsa Zsa: a young (?) white-haired European woman with a quasi-Russian accent, Zsa Zsa is a bisexual dominatrix always dressed in purple leather and wielding a whip. She loves SM sex and enjoys whipping Smokey or Drunk and Bitter Jesus.

Drunk and Bitter Jesus: Jesus himself appears in the comic. He is back from the dead, but after having been nailed and persecuted, he has become drunk and bitter and hangs out in The Spanked Monkey, often giving out cynical philosophy to the other patrons. Drunk and Bitter Jesus is one of the most popular characters in the comic.

F'Ga: a pink one-eyed tentacle monster. He's queer, he's here, get used to it. He is currently in a committed relationship with a human named Bobby.

Chick Boy: an extreme-right religious fundamentalist who forcefully distributes Chick Tracts. Chick Boy only desires to convert those around him to the joy which is hating people for Jesus. He preaches against homosexuality and deviance. Because of this, he got kicked out of The Spanked Monkey, after which he was seduced by Freddy. The two have since become something of an item.

Bunny Boy: (Text from ghastlycomic.com) Bisexual, furry, and proud. Bunny Boy is a whole bundle of various fetishes all wrapped up in one furry package. He possesses a persecution complex bigger than the Greater Toronto Area. He enjoys shocking people with his sexual antics but then whines when the consequences are a boot to his ass.

Kwerki: a very odd and possibly quite deeply disturbed young woman, who wears an oversized, stretched sweater, workboots, and a blank stare. She is often heard philosophizing about sex to anyone who will listen.

Cosplay Girl: (Text from ghastlycomic.com) A self-confessed attention whore who employs cosplay to not only escape having to deal with reality but to get attention from those around her. Her cospay is a part of her everyday life and not just something restricted to anime and science-fiction conventions. She talks the talk but rarely walks the walk.

Tentaclax: a tentacle demon lord who walks the Earth until he can prove himself as a tentacle monster by losing his virginity. Though he seems large and imposing, he is very shy and has trouble approaching girls to rape them.

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Ghastly's Ghastly Comic